Welcome, fellow founders! I want to address something we often whisper about in our quieter moments, a shadow that looms over many of us that shapes our startup journeys in ways we don’t always want to admit: the impact of social doubt.
Social Doubt in the Startup World
As a startup founder, I've had to navigate the choppy waters of comparing my own milestones to those of blockbuster successes, which can often leave me with a stinging feeling of inadequacy. We all scroll through social media or industry news, where tales of breakout startups receiving rapid funding and industry-changing innovations seem to be the norm rather than the exception. But today, I want to shift the narrative and talk about how these feelings of doubt don't have to define or derail us.
So, what exactly is social doubt?
Social doubt refers to the uncertainty or lack of confidence that you may experience when reflecting on your social standing, abilities, or decisions, often as a result of comparing yourself to others. This feeling is particularly prevalent in environments where societal expectations are exceptionally high, such as in professional settings, academia, or within highly visible social groups. Social doubt can manifest as feelings of inadequacy, anxiety, self-criticism, or the feelings you’d typically think of when thinking about “doubt”. Often times these feelings may either stem from, or be exacerbated by, perceiving one's own achievements, skills, or status as inferior compared to those of peers or poorly defined societal benchmarks.
The Weight of Comparison
Every startup founder, at some point, finds themselves scrolling through success stories on social media or tech blogs. It's natural. But when does this admiration & quest for inspiration turn into toxic comparisons? Let’s take Instagram for example. Instagram’s meteoric rise is inspiring, achieving over 1 million users within the first month of launching and quickly being acquired by Facebook for a whopping $1 billion. But when we compare our day-to-day struggles to such narratives, it can start to skew our self-perception and underplay our own achievements that are absolutely worth celebrating.
I remember sitting at a coffee shop, staring at an article detailing yet another startup’s freshly closed multi-million dollar Seed Round. In that moment, I felt like I was watching myself running a race, already in last place and falling behind the pact. For founders, it's a common scene: over-caffeinated, under-slept, and despairing over someone else’s highlight reel. In some this may inspire motivation, but for others it can lead to a downward spiral.
Studies in social psychology help shed some light on this. One 1954 study conducted by Festinger [link] introduced the theory of social comparison, suggesting that we have an innate drive to evaluate ourselves based on how we stack up against others. This can be motivating, yes, but it can also be equally as devastating. More recent research expands on this, showing that such comparisons made through observing social media can lead to strong feelings of inadequacy and reduced self-esteem.
Yet another study found that roughly 60% of entrepreneurs admit that comparing their start-up’s performance with others has led to feelings of doubt or inadequacy. This isn’t just about feeling down or “not good enough”—it’s equally about how social doubt affects our decision-making, creativity, and ultimately our success.
Real Stories from the Trenches
Let’s talk some real talk. I reached out to a few fellow founders while preparing this post, some first-time founders like myself and others on their second or third go. One shared, “Every time I see a funding announcement, I feel like my progress is too slow, even though I’m on track with our business plan.” This isn't uncommon, and i’m sure at one point or another you must’ve felt something similar. I know I have.
Another mentioned, “I had to stop checking LinkedIn. It made me doubt every small win we worked hard for.” Can you relate?
These stories underline a pretty simple truth: We are often our harshest critics, and our ability to critique ourselves only grows by the glittering success stories that populate our feeds and timelines.
Strategies for Managing Social Doubt
It’d be crazy for me to talk about all this without suggesting a few tips for managing feelings of social doubt, wouldn’t it? Here are a few practical, easy-to-adopt ways that I use to combat these feelings of doubt and reframe my thinking:
Define, or Redefine, Your Own Success Metrics
Create and adhere to personal benchmarks that reflect your startup's values and long-term vision, not just the industry standards or external achievements, can immensely help recalibrate your perception of success. Instead of constantly measuring your progress against industry giants or fleeting market trends (because ALL market trends are fleeting), focus on what success means for you—whether it’s reaching a customer satisfaction milestone, achieving product development goals, or maintaining a healthy work-life balance. This approach not only creates a healthier mental state but also aligns your daily work with your overarching entrepreneurial aspirations.
Limit Exposure
This one may sound obvious, but it’s worth noting. Be intentional about your consumption of social media and news. It’s about informed awareness, not constant comparisons. Curate your media consumption with the precision of an editor, or Marie Kondo (if it doesn’t serve you, drop it!) Too often we find ourselves endlessly scrolling through social media and news feeds then wonder why we feel drained, filled with doubt, or behind our peers & competitors. By choosing to engage selectively with content that is informative and uplifting, you protect your mental space from the barrage of comparisons. Set specific times for checking these platforms, and use tools and settings that filter out the noise, keeping you focused on inputs that genuinely add value to your personal and professional growth.
Building a Supportive Founder Community
Entrepreneurship can often be a lonely journey, especially if you’re a solopreneur - but it doesn’t have to be. Actively seek out or build a community of fellow founders who are navigating similar challenges. Engage with other founders who emphasize realistic progress and mutual support, not vanity metrics and ego. Sharing struggles and victories can demystify the perceived isolation and ground the startup founder journey in reality. Such communities are invaluable for providing perspective, sharing resources, and offering encouragement during tough times.
Mindfulness and Reflection: Tools for Mental Resilience
Consistently take time to regularly reflect on your journey and achievements. Mindfulness can help center your thoughts away from comparative anxieties and towards constructive actions. Invest time in developing mindfulness practices that anchor you to the present and prevent any negative spirals that can be triggered by comparison. Techniques such as meditation, journaling, or even just simple breathing exercises can help center your thoughts and nurture a sense of inner calm. Regular reflection on your journey also allows you to celebrate the progress you’ve made, recognize the hurdles you’ve overcome, and plan for the future with a clear, focused mind. This is how confidence and resilience are not only built, but strengthened.
Embracing a Balanced View and Your Unique Entrepreneurial Path
Understanding the psychology of social comparison and acknowledging the universal nature of these challenges can empower us to navigate these waters more gracefully. It's about finding balance between aspiration and realism, using the stories of others to inspire rather than intimidate.
Remember, the path of entrepreneurship is uniquely yours. While others’ milestones can guide us, they shouldn’t define us. Here’s to building futures that are as fulfilling as they are successful. Let’s turn the tide on social doubt, together.
As we reach the conclusion of our journey through the murky and often troubled waters of social doubt, it’s vital to pause and reflect on the essence of our individual entrepreneurial paths. Each of us carries a unique blueprint for success that cannot be replicated by simple comparisons or overshadowed by the achievements of others. Embracing this fact is not just liberating; it's empowering. By recognizing and celebrating the distinct uniqueness of our ventures, we can begin to fortify ourselves against the storms of doubt while simultaneously reinforcing our commitment to the visions we set out to achieve.
Let this be a call to action for all of us in the startup community: to rise above the noise, to focus on what truly matters, and to carve out a path that honors our personal values and visions. No two entrepreneurial journeys will ever the same, even if they’re both your own, and I think there’s beauty in that. Your journey is defined by the passion, perseverance, and authenticity you bring to it each day. Stand firm in your pursuits, draw strength from your challenges, and let your unique story inspire others as much as it guides you. Together, let's redefine success on our own terms and continue to push the boundaries of what's possible, one authentic step at a time.